6 weeks to go

Throughout my elementary, junior high, and high school years, grades were always done in six week cycles. Considering my life basically revolved around my grades (I was, am, and ever shall be a nerd), I approached life in six-week segments. I guess that is why it seems like a big deal to me that I've reached the 6-weeks-to-go point of my pregnancy. There are a lot of thoughts circulating through my mind at this point, but here is a sampling, for better or worse:

-I'm going to worry a lot about this person for the rest of my life. If he has a slow morning with little movement, I start panicking and poking him until he wakes up and does some aerobics for me. If I worry this much now, what am I going to do when he goes to Kindergarten or his first field trip or summer camp or (oh, my soul) college!?!

-I couldn't possibly get any bigger. Surely not. It couldn't happen. Ever. Right?

-This is going to hurt. I mean, getting him from point A to point B is going to hurt. Big time. (I don't care what anyone says, this thought has to run through the mind of every pregnant woman at some point.)

-I'm tired of keeping his name a secret. I like his name and I dislike secrets. See how this is a problem?

-A mouse might send me into premature labor. No, really, it might. I saw a mouse in our kitchen (first one ever) Tuesday night. I had a massive panic attack and made BJ immediately run to the store and get a whole slew of mouse-killing products. In the mean time, I'm still panicking. Last night, I wash clothe fell off of the kitchen counter onto me foot. Immediately assuming it was a mouse, I royally freaked to the point that I actually had a contraction. Let me make this clear: A wash rag I confused for a mouse gave me a contraction.

-My ribs hurt. He ran out of room about three weeks ago, but he keeps growing.

-I love how joyful babies make people. I contacted a professor of mine from ACU this week to ask for a reference, and in his response email, he congratulated me on the baby and told me a little about the birth of his son. It was a sweet story that made me day. Related to this point, people keep grinning at my belly everywhere I go. I wish I had a hidden camera on me to capture all the goofy smiles I get.

-My brother is going to be an uncle. This could get interesting.

-I have to pee, again. You've got to be kidding me.

-The constant rib pain and bladder discomfort and shortness of breath is making it very had to censor myself. I keep saying what I'm thinking, which is never a good thing. Poor BJ. He had no idea how much I was holding back before.

-If I love this little boy this much now, what will it be like after he is born? I keep trying to picture it, but it is beyond me.

As more thoughts come, I'll try to keep you posted. Then, 18 years from now, I can show my son what I was thinking as I awaited his arrival. And he can say, "Wow, Mom, that must have been really humiliating for you."